Jughead's POV
by m0nica
Summary: All of season one, episode by episode, based on what Jughead was thinking. It's primarily about Betty, as I'd imagine that's a big chunk of what he thinks about, but there is of course things about his family, Archie, and the murder case. Enjoy!
1. 1x1

Archie was an idiot. Jughead could not even begin to comprehend how anyone could turn his head when he had Betty wrapped around his finger. He acknowledged that Veronica was attractive, but she was no Betty Cooper. Jughead was almost angry at Archie for turning her down.

There has never been a single girl who made Jughead feel the way he did when he thought about Betty. The only females he had ever even wanted in his life were his mother and sister, affectionally know as Jellybean, but obviously he felt very differently about them than he did Betty. She was the only girl who he ever truly cared for, whom he wanted to be happy. That's why he wanted to slug Archie in the face.

It wasn't even just that Archie had hurt her, it was that Archie was an idiot. He must be stupid if he even for a moment thought there was anyone out there more desirable than Betty. Jughead had already made up his mind about Veronica and he was not a fan. She was entitled and catty, and he knew that she too was involved in Betty's heartbreak. Hearing about their kiss at school, the only topic of conversation floating around the halls it seemed, made him ill. He and Archie weren't exactly buddy-buddy anymore, but he still had faith in the guy. But now? Jughead was too angry to be rational.


	2. 1x2

Jughead was back to eating alone. He hadn't had to do this in a while. He typically ate with Archie, and when he wasn't around he'd eat with Betty. He didn't really talk much, but it was seldom noticed. Usually Archie and Betty chatted away with their respective friends and Jughead sat and ate.

He wondered if him and Archie would ever be friends again. He'd always considered them to be more like brothers, but seeing Archie's reaction to his attempt to strike up conversation in the hallway was indicative that relationship might be over.

His first attempt at confrontation was unsuccessful, but after seeing Betty run off in tears, Jughead had no problem upsetting Archie with his accusations. He knew something was up that day in July, but after seeing him and the music teacher in the classroom, Jughead's suspicions were confirmed.

Jughead's initial thoughts were simply _Is Grundy why he isn't into Betty?_ Honestly, Jughead was kind of grossed out. She was average at best and Betty was far from that. He saw through Grundy's act. He knew Archie was being used, and as his friend he felt obliged to tell him. As expected, he didn't take it well. Jughead was adamant about protecting Archie and he was unbelievably frustrated that Archie wasn't letting him. Tensions rose, but even though Jughead knew he wouldn't hurt him, Archie confirmed that even a little bit of him cared enough about him. Jughead walked back to the drive-in, praying that Archie would heed his warning and do that right thing.

It wasn't until Archie defended him to Reggie that Jughead's hopes for their friendship returned. Archie's apology before the pep rally warmed Jughead. Even though he didn't like to admit it, he needed Archie in his life. That was his best friend, his brother, his only ally in this world. He knew that eventually Archie would do the right thing and tell the police the truth, but he wasn't sure if he'd ever come back to Jughead. Archie didn't need Jughead like Jughead needed Archie, and he was forever grateful to the stars that he would have Archie back in his life.

And even after that, life got even better. Betty and her new rekindled friend, much to Jughead's dismay, invited them to join them at Pop's. And even though, to him, there were merely three of them in that booth and he was not one of them, Betty's attempt at normalcy gave him solace.

In fact, everything had gone back to normal, at least until Cheryl seemingly confessed to her guilt.


	3. 1x3

Riverdale was in shambles. Jughead was absorbed in his writing, only entering the real world again when was forcibly dragged.

One of the things that forcibly dragged him out was Betty. He received a text from her asking him to meet her in the newsroom. Intrigued, he came and heard her plea for him to join the Blue & Gold. He didn't really want to, honestly, he thought it would be a waste of time. He was doing his own writing and he didn't think the school newspaper was the place for his journalistic debut, but to his own surprise he agreed. In that moment, there was nothing more appealing than that damned school newspaper. Him and Betts were actually on the same wavelength about where the investigation needed to go, which surprised him. Betty was surprisingly into the investigation, but even more surprisingly was actually really smart about it. Jughead almost felt guilty for underestimating her. He didn't think a girl like her would bat an eyelash at this.

After talking to Doley and to the other adventure scouts, Jughead was feeling very confident about his first article for the paper. His first instinct wasn't even his own book. He was back to being consumed by his writing.

Archie Andrews also forcibly dragged him back to reality. Jughead heard the song he wrote at the Taste of Riverdale event while he was hunting down Doley, but he was damn proud of Archie. The song was _good_. Even though he wasn't much of R &B or pop guy, Jughead still appreciated the handiwork of his pal. It made him happy to see Archie's face light up in pride. Jughead shot him a compliment. Archie was good and he deserved to know it.

The final thing that night that forced him back into reality was seeing Betty Cooper walking to Pop's in a mini skirt, tied up top, and cherry red lipstick. He wasn't typically one to gawk at a girl, but Jughead had to force his own eyes back in his head. His eyes followed her as she strutted into the door, adjusting his position to an angle where he could see who she was meeting with. Archie perhaps? That would be disappointing. In fact, the truth was much more disappointing. Jughead turned around and walked away the moment he saw the likes of Chuck Clayton in the booth. _Come on, Betts. What are you doing?_


	4. 1x4

The last thing that could really snap Jughead back into reality was the loss of his precious drive-in theater. He knew his friends were sick of him bitching about it, but he couldn't help it. He was _pissed_. The Twilight was home; more of a home than FP's trailer. He literally lived there now, which was part of the reason for him to be angry, but almost every positive childhood memory he had was at the Twilight. He also was out his job, which he needed now that he was on his own.

His own sour mood almost made him miss the fact that Betty too wasn't her usual sunshine self. He knew the reason, but he also knew he couldn't speak on it, so he decided to bite his tongue and ignore it. She even took a stab at him, suggesting he was a rebel without a cause, which made his grumpy mood a little bit brighter.

That was, of course until Betty spotted Archie, Fred, and Grundy walk in. _Fuck._ He silently cursed, resisting the urge to throw his arm around Betty and forcibly hold her in her seat. He cursed Kevin for pointing it out.

"I'll be right back," Betty whispered, determination in her eyes.

"Betty, don't! No!" Jughead pleaded, reaching for his shoulders just a moment too late.

Jughead watched in horror as she approached their booth and walked Archie out the door. He wanted desperately to protect Archie, and he had tried his best, but Betts was smart and determined. She cared about Archie, too, and he knew her well enough to know that it didn't take her long to figure out what was going on between him and Grundy. He felt bad for Archie, but the majority of his pity went to Betty. The guy had just rejected her a week ago, but now she knew it was for his music teacher. That ought to sting.

He watched through the window at the pair, never wanting anything more than he wanted to be able to read lips in this moment. He knew they were unhappy by their body language, but when they both looked at him through the window he knew he'd been caught. He was annoyed by Veronica's narcissism. Leave it to V to make the entire thing about herself. Jughead didn't even bother to try to get her to stay in the booth. She wasn't worth it, and it this point what would it even change.

He wanted the chance to apologize to Betts for not telling her, as he knew that kind of thing would upset her. It was just his luck when Alice Cooper pulled up, forcing Betty to go home.

He was frustrated with Archie. He was ridiculous to think Betty would expose him and hurt him, even though in the back of Jughead's mind he was thinking about how Archie kind of deserved it. He had really hurt Betty, and for what? His 30 something-year-old teacher? God, Archie was an idiot.

His day didn't improve, as he had his final hopes of saving his home, the Twilight, ripped from his fingers by the mayor. Begging Fred didn't help either. He knew it sounded ridiculous to be as upset as he was, but he was absolutely devastated. As he always did, he threw himself into his writing to distract himself from the inevitable truth: he was screwed.

He walked back to the drive in for his last shift, dread and despair in his heart. He set up the movie, non-coincidentally _Rebel Without a Cause_ , and begrudgingly got to work. He sat in the film booth, looking out into the lot until he spotted Kevin Keller's truck with Veronica in tow. _No Betty?_ He wondered if she was still upset about Archie. He was surprised at how disappointed he was that she didn't come. He chose this movie for her after all, and he really did wish she had come.

The next morning he was forced to pack up. He didn't think he'd actually have to do it. In his heart, he really thought he would find a way to keep his home. He took his spray can and painted "Jughead Jones wuz here" with his signature crown symbol. Part of him wanted to burn down the old building himself. He was shattered. This was truly the only home had ever known even before it was where he rested his head. He had never been so attached to anything as he was this theatre.

Seeing his father wasn't exactly the cherry on top either. He asked where he was going to live, where Jughead could only respond, "I'll figure it out, Dad. I always do." He knew him not living his father destroyed them both inside, but he figured it was the only way he'd ever make him change. He walked off into the distance, no destination in mind, trying to fight back tears.


	5. 1x5

As per usual, Jughead's main focus was on the murder investigation.

That was until Trev Brown came into the newsroom. Betty was kind and welcoming, as she always was, and for a brief moment Jughead thought nothing of it. That was until Betty uttered the words, "It's a date." _A date? With_ Trev _? What?!_ Jughead was floored. He knew he had to worry about Archie still, but Trev? He didn't understand what Betty was up to lately. First Chuck, now Trev? Was she just going after all of the jocks to get to Archie? Or was it that now it was established that Betty and Archie were not going to happen that the entire team found Betty to be fair game? Jughead felt ill. He didn't want Betty to be another name in the book of conquests.

Jughead did his best to hide the jealousy rising in him. He looked up at Kevin, both of them equally as lost. He then looked back at Trev, trying not to glare.

Jughead didn't want to address it so he was thankful for Kevin. Betty swore it wasn't a real date, but that didn't calm the fury inside of him. He spat, "You just called it a date. You literally said 'It's a date.'" Jughead knew he had no right to be, but he was livid. He had always had a soft spot for Betty Cooper. He admired her from afar, but it wasn't until he got older when he realized it was entirely romantic. She was quite literally the only girl Jughead had any romantic or even sexual interest in. Betty was the only girl that turned his head, and he was certain at this rate she would probably be the only girl. She was kind to him and she cared about him, which was unique in itself, but Jughead was honestly just amazed by her achievement of perfection. She was just that: perfect. She was gorgeous beyond competition, one of the sharpest and brightest in the school, a kind soul, an extrovert, and she was a blast to be around. Betty Cooper was one of a kind, and unfortunately Jughead wasn't the only one with an eye for her.

He couldn't focus on the case anymore. _Trev Brown? Really?_ He was objectively attractive, sure, but the guy was a brick wall. He was nice, but he had literally no personality. He was just a meathead and Jughead never thought that would be what would appeal to Betty. If it was, Jughead was even more hopeless than he had thought.

Jughead was eager to hear about her date the next day. He figured out how he could ask about it jokingly without seeming too eager. He figured he could make a crack about it being an intelligence gathering. He didn't even know Betty and Trev were friends, or that they even talked. Jughead couldn't remember them even saying hello in the hallway to each other. The whole Scooby gang sat on the bleachers at lunch later that day, a whole two minutes together before Veronica, at this point the bane of his existence, brought up the date. Jughead swallowed hard, preparing himself to go back to suppressing his feelings once more. He had tried focusing solely on the case, but that only led back to Betty's "intelligence gathering mission."

He saw her smile and forced himself to look away. _So it was a good date. She likes him. Great._ Thankfully the topic of conversation quickly changed. Jughead forced himself to listen to Archie and to Val as they talked, but quickly regretted this decision when Betty leaned towards Archie and rested her hand on his shoulder. Kevin gave him a sympathetic look. _That obvious, huh?_

Jughead always thought he hid his emotions well. Betty had never out right confronted him about it, and she was a pretty confrontational person, but she was also too kind to ever say anything before he did. He had been enthralled by Betty, wrapped around her finger, since he was a kid, but it wasn't into high school that he realized he was in love with her. He loved her so much it hurt. He never once found it worth saying anything, being that her love affair with Archie was notorious. He pined after her and sometimes caught himself fantasizing about being with her, but he was also so happy to have her as a friend. To be near her was to love her, and he didn't exactly think he was her one true love, even if she may be his.

Jughead spent his night working on his novel in his supply closet under the stairs, thinking about what Betty was doing. He wondered if she was still with Trev, if he had walked her home, or if they had kissed. He forced himself to think about these things because he may have to hear about them tomorrow. He forced the pain down, to the void where it remained, and fell asleep.

He didn't see Betty until their shared free period the next day. She was gloomy, which was new. Jughead battled between addressing it, but after looking up at her face he couldn't stand it anymore. He very timidly, with his best attempt at being non-chalant, asked "So, Betts, how was your date?"

He inwardly cringed at the word date. _Would she deny that's what it was again?_

She then relayed everything Trev had told her. Jughead knew that must have been hard for her to hear. His heart broke for her. He apologized for her, but she just shook her head and kept talking about Polly.

He snapped back into work mode. His mind was reeling with the new information, but he quickly realized the next step was to search Jason's room.

He went to her house before the memorial. He had put together a suit from pieces he found at Goodwill and of course he couldn't resist throwing on his signature hat. He was nervous as he had never really spent that much alone time with Betty outside of school since he had come to the realization he was in love with her. In fact, up until she asked him to work on the school paper he hadn't spent much alone time with her at all. It was getting quite difficult for him, he realized, to keep hiding his feelings. It was exponentially harder to hide them when she looked at him the way she did when she saw him in that suit. He looked away nervously, trying to fight back his elation, biting his tongue to prevent himself from telling her he loved her. He had half a mind to tell her she was stunningly beautiful everyday but that in her all black dress and sweater she looked impossibly more beautiful. He resisted the urge.

He sat with her at the memorial and focused on his hands. He was never a fan of Jason Blossom, or even Cheryl for that matter, but he did feel for her. He couldn't imagine what he would do if he lost jellybean. When he saw her wearing that white dress, the white dress, he was spooked. His breath hitched. He didn't know the details, but the atmosphere of the room was indicative of the fact that this was not part of the plan.

After the memorial he and Betty crept up to Jason's room. They searched the room cautiously, until his heart stopped at the sound of an old woman's voice. Betty leapt back and Jughead caught her in his arms. He put his arm around her protectively, fearing for both their lives. His heart was pounding out of his chest, and his proximity to Betty allowed him to see that her was doing the same thing. She wasn't breathing. He put his free hand on her waist and brought her closer to his chest. This was half to protect her, but also half to comfort him. She spoke to the old woman, accidentally shrugging of his hand. He moved it to the small of her back, not yet ready to let her out of his reach. He held his breath as she walked toward the old woman. He followed her, keeping his hands on her body for as long as he could. He didn't release his breath until Betty teared up and ran out the room.

"Betts, wait!" he called out after her. She turned to him and practically threw herself into his embrace. She was so overwhelmed, and for the second time that day his heart broke for her. He rubbed her hair with one hand, holding her tight with his other as she cried into him. He whispered reassuring things to her, telling her everything was going to be fine and to just breathe. She nuzzled her face into the crook of her neck. He could feel the hot tears on his skin and he wondered if she moved to ensure she didn't get makeup on his clothing. He held her for as long as she let him, thanking his lucky stars for this moment, yet knowing he would have done anything to keep her from feeling this way. Once she got her composure she thanked him, gave his hand a gentle squeeze, and ran downstairs to get her father.

Jughead walked back to school, hung up his new suit, and tossed and turned all night.

The next morning things were not any better for the pair. Her mood has not at all improved. She sat with him in the newsroom and vented about her family. This wasn't her usual "my mom is crazy" conversation either. She was destroyed by this. She felt as if she was alone, which Jughead had much experience knowing was a horrible feeling. He wished the level of disappointment he felt for his family on no one.

He had lots of things he could say that he knew would do nothing to console her, and he wasn't even sure if it was his place to try. Instead, he did the only thing he could think of, his best coping mechanism: distraction. He kept his mind back on the investigation and dragged hers with it. He wondered if he was too blunt, but he knew that he wasn't the only one who thought of this possibility. Hesitantly, yet with conviction, he handed her a yellow slip of paper that said "The Coopers." He looked at her, knowing she was going to be okay, and stated, "We need to talk to Polly."


	6. 1x6

Betty never ceased to amaze Jughead. Her plan to get into her mother's person was simple yet brilliant. Jughead would get a free meal out of it, which was something he was in no position to turn down. All he had to do was eat free food, and out of all the things that could be said about Alice Cooper, bad cook was not one of them. He simply had to eat and ask for the bathroom. He wasn't quite sure it would work, but he figured that Alice's disgust towards him and fear he'd steal something would be reason enough for her to follow him.

He rang the Cooper's doorbell at 7:30 on the dot. He was nervous as hell, but not for fear of failure. He knew Mrs. Cooper thought badly of him, as most did in Riverdale, but for some reason she in particular bothered him. He wanted Betty's mom to approve of him.

Betty opened the door. Jughead was greeted by Betty's signature bright smile. He followed her in the door and allowed her to fix him a plate. He thanked her, genuinely grateful, and took a seat. After a few moments, Alice broke the tense silence.

"So, _Jughead_ " she practically spat his name, "I guess we have you to thank for Betty's ongoing obsession with this Jason Blossom ghoulishness." Betty quickly corrected her, to which Alice replied with venom.

Betty gave Jughead an affirming nod, signalling his cue. He asked where the bathroom was, even though he had been to the Cooper's home countless times. Like clockwork, Alice escorted him. He was suddenly nervous again. He looked back at Betty, half to signal her and half for reassurance. He thought that if she wasn't so focused she would laugh at his discomfort.

He stood in the bathroom sink and tried to calm his nerves. He was honestly surprised by how much he wanted Alice's approval, which made her cold demeanor even more terrifying. The more pressing issue was that Betty found something. He was hoping to avoid having to do something more illegal, like opening Alice's mail or hacking into her computer. The sleuth in Jughead was _so_ eager to find Polly to get answers. He knew that Polly would have more information than anyone at this point, but the human in him wanted Betty to be able to reunite with her sister. The two were always really close and being without her was taking a toll on Betty. She deserved to know where Polly was and if she was okay. He hoped and prayed she was. He didn't know if Betty could handle losing Polly for good.

He took a few deep breaths, counted to thirty, washed his hands for good measure, and returned to the table. Betty's facial expression was perfectly neutral, and the two continued eating in silence. Alice returned only to take their plates and tell them they should probably head off to school.

When he thought they were a safe distance from the house, Jughead asked her what she found.

"Well, I found a check to some place called 'Sisters of Quiet Mercy.' That was all I had time for."

"So do you think that has to do with where Polly is?" Jughead questioned. This was a twist.

"Maybe. It was a pretty big check, so whatever it is my mom is really shelling out some money. I don't know what else it could possibly be about."

"We can go to the newsroom during homeroom and figure it all out, Betts. We'll google it."

"Thanks for helping, Jug. You're the best." she smiled gently at him, making his whole body melt. She headed down the hall, Jughead still frozen in place, and called out behind her, "See you during homeroom!"

Jughead rushed out of his first class and beat her to the newsroom. He whipped out his laptop and typed furiously into the Word document for his novel. He was interrupted by the sound of the door opening.

"Hey Jug!" Betty smiled, shrugging off her cardigan. Jughead couldn't help but let himself fixate on the newly revealed skin. He focused in on her sharp collarbones and the smooth, tanned skin of her arms and shoulders. Her shoulders were strong and defined and her arms were toned, but it didn't take anything away from her delicate and feminine appearance. He stopped just for a moment to revel at her beauty, not being able to help himself from just gawking at her. It was a rarity to see her even this exposed and he took a thousand mental pictures to keep the memory alive. She walked over to the desk and got behind him, capturing Jughead's breath by the feeling of her own on the back of his neck.

He stuttered, "Oh, um, w-what's the check for again?"

Betty pulled the image onto her phone, "Um, Sisters of Quiet Mercy. What is that? Like a church? Or a charity?"

He typed the name into Sleuthster.

"No, uh, it's a human for troubled youths," he read, "Where disenfranchised teens will learn such virtues as discipline and respect, enjoying lives of quiet reflection and servitude." Jughead was taken aback. It was a known fact that Alice and Hal Cooper was very intense. Their hatred of the Blossoms was unprecedented, but he still couldn't believe they would send Polly somewhere like that just for dating one. He wanted if they'd send Betty away for dating someone they didn't like. Would they send her away if she was with Archie? Or him?

He felt horrible for Betty. Her parents had _lied_ to her. He couldn't imagine how much that would hurt. He felt pity for Polly, who had never been anything but kind to him, but his heart really went out to Betts.

He thought about her throughout all of his classes. He just couldn't wrap his head around how her parents could do that. He had a mental picture of what the Sisters of Quiet Mercy looked like, and it wasn't a pleasant place. He had proposed him and Betty go after school and she anxiously agreed. He knew this was going to be a lot for to handle but he knew that she needed the truth. She needed to know.

He was particularly irritated at Archie today, trying to hide his snappy attitude when Archie wanted to come with them. He valued his alone time with Betty more than anything else and he was not happy about Archie trying to invade it. Archie was also physically incapable of keeping his problems to himself and Betty was physically incapable of not being compassionate and selfless. Betty needed someone to actually support her and be there for her. She needed someone to push her to keep pursuing this, and Jughead knew that Archie would not do that. He also didn't like Archie being near Betty at all, at least not with their complicated history. Jughead knew that Archie thought he had some stupid "bro" claim over her, and he couldn't bring himself to honor such a moronic concept. He was too in love with Betty to let Archie get in his way or to derail their mission.

As he often found himself doing lately, Jughead spent his classes thinking about Betty. He tried to relive the feeling of her breath against his neck, her hands on his shoulders, her lips mere inches away from his face. He tried to reimagine her without her cardigan, and then he imagined her without anything on at all. He still couldn't wrap his around the fact that someone like her even existed, and even more than this he couldn't believe she actually befriended him. He had started to wonder if Betty was interested in him, too. He thought about the way she looked at him before the funeral. He thought about the way she crumbled into his arms after speaking to the Blossom grandmother. He thought about the way she smiled at him every time he approached her. He thought about the way she laughed at his jokes, seemingly harder than she ever laughed at Kevin's, Veronica's, or even Archie's. He couldn't be sure if he was just building it up in his head, but he had a hard time believing that this level of emotion could possibly be one-sided. He imagined what she would say if she knew. He wondered if she'd be scared or creeped out, but after the way she rebuilt her friendship with Archie, Jughead didn't think it would be a problem. By fifth period he had decided that he had to tell her how he felt. He just couldn't hold it in any longer. He just _had_ to try. If he didn't now, he was afraid he'd never have the courage.

After the final bell he bolted to Betty's locker. She was already there, leaning against the door and packing up her books.

"Ready?" he asked, putting his hand on her upper back for reassurance. She smiled, "ready as I'll ever be."

Jughead had already figured out the bus route. They chased after the bus and sat down. Betty didn't peel her eyes from the window. They sat in comfortable silence until Jughead breathed out, "I think this is it." He pulled on the dangling wire, signaling it was their stop. The two stepped off the bus and Jughead's heart immediately sunk. The place looked _bad_. The Cooper's sent Polly to a place like this because of a boy? He was starting to rethink coming clean to Betty.

"Don't judge a place for troubled teens by its cover, right?" He tried. Betty's face was determined. She tightened her pony tail, clearly a source of power for her, and stepped into the creepy building.

Jughead waited for Betty in the lobby. He fiddled his thumbs, praying to the Lord that Polly was okay. He couldn't imagine how Betty would feel if something was seriously wrong with her. He hoped that the place wasn't as bad as it seemed, but he couldn't imagine that was the case. He sat in that lobby for almost ten minutes, tapping his foot and wishing as hard as he could that this whole ordeal would help Betty get some closure. Selfishly, he also hoped she's knew something about Jason.

When he saw Alice come in the door, he shot up. He followed her and the orderly up the stairs to Polly's room and no one even tried to stop him. They wouldn't have been able to, anyway. Something was wrong.

He watched in horror as Polly shouted at Alice, tears beginning to form in Betty's eyes. That was low even for Alice. It was then when he spotted the unmistakable bump in her shirt. _Holy shit. Polly is pregnant._ Everything was starting to make sense. He instinctively lunged for Betty when the orderly grabbed her, trying to pull her out of harms way. He was blocked by another guard and was unsuccessful in his short battle to get to Betty. He stopped pushing back and watched as Polly was dragged down the hallway, both Alice and Betty starting to tear up.

"Let's go." Alice hissed, grabbing her daughter by the arm. Jughead followed suit. Betty ripped her arm from her mother and Jughead took the opportunity to throw his arm around her. She sobbed into his chest as he rubbed soothing circled into her back, pulling her closer to him. He had no words that would even begin to describe how he felt. He was so incredibly sorry for her. A tear-filled car ride back to Riverdale with Mrs. Cooper didn't seem like the appropriate place for him to profess his love for her either.

He walked off from the Cooper's house after wrapping Betty up in his arms one more time and whispering, "It's going to be aright, Betts. We're going to get her out of there." She nodded, wiping her tears from her eyes. He sauntered off, not exactly sure where he was going, and ended up in a booth at Pop's. He poured himself into his writing, replacing every ounce of worry he had with pure, unfiltered focus. Hours later, he was snapped back into the real world by an aggressive vibration from his phone. He read a frantic paragraph from Betty and he could practically see the pain in her words. He shot up immediately, throwing his laptop back into his bag, and stormed off to Cooper's.

He thought the whole way about what he'd say to her. He debated telling her he loved her and that he always had, but also considered that the better approach may be to just ask her on a real date. He had every intention of being romantic as hell, gentlemanly and sweet, but he was so nervous he wasn't sure he'd be able to tell her at all. He was determined not to chicken out. He had developed his entire speech by the time he had climbed the ladder to her window and knocked. She spun around, and as per usual, greeted him with a bright smile. It struck him that maybe this was an odd gesture, but she seemed to be pleasantly surprised.

He looked longingly into her eyes, "Hey there, Juliet. Nurse off duty?"

She smiled brightly again and he spoke again, "You haven't gone full _Yellow Wallpaper_ on me yet have you?"

He watched her lips as she spoke, ranting and raving about her family. His heart broke for her for the hundredth time that day. He was still in awe about the events of the day and he was starting to lose his resolve. His words of comfort came out of him without his permission, as he was so nervous he was not in control of his body anymore. He knew all too well the fear of becoming like your parents. She was nothing like Alice and Hal. She needed to know that.

He watched his own hand touch her shoulder, again without his consent. His words rang with sincerity as he spoke them. If she couldn't tell he loved her then, he wasn't sure if she would ever be able to.

"Also," he breathed. He waited for the words to come out. Everything he had prepared to say had suddenly vanished.

"What?" she asked. Jughead looked down in search for his words. He had gone blank.

"What!?" she pressed, raising an eyebrow at him.

 _To hell with it._ His eyes flickered between her lips and her eyes. He looked into her eyes for one final moment and reached for her, pulling her in for a searing kiss. In retrospect, this was better than words. This was all he needed.

He held her there for a moment, not daring to move a muscle. He held her face tight in his hands, his lips soaking in the feeling of her soft ones pressed against his. He pulled her away from him, terrified of her reaction. She parted her lips against his and Jughead could've melted. That was all the confirmation he needed that a part of Betty had some extent of romantic feelings for him. He was elated. He exhaled deeply, all of the tension he had felt floating away.

Betty pulled back, "The car!"

Jughead couldn't help but smile. He was glad he could bring her clarity, but in classic Betty fashion she was still focused on something entirely different than herself and the moment she was in.

"Wow, that's what you were thinking about in the middle of our moment?" he teased, still holding her face in his hands. He wasn't ready to give up the moment. Is that what they had just had? A moment?

He followed her train of thought about the car and grabbed her hand, leading her out the door. The walked in silence, but hand-in-hand. Upon finding the car, the sleuth in Jughead had activated. He couldn't believe his eyes. He could laugh at Betty's innocence at the fact she didn't know what a block of marijuana looked like. Part of him was relieved that Polly really wasn't crazy. That would make things easier for Betty, but it only made the plot thicken even more in regards to the case. They immediately began sprinting back to the school. Jughead's heart was racing. This was _huge._ After finding the Sheriff, him and Betty bolted back to the police car to show him everything they had found. This day had been so great that of course it had to go up in flames, just like Jason and Polly's car.

Upon looking at the car Betty turned to Jughead and stated, "Polly." Jughead nodded and Betty immediately took out her phone and called an Uber. The two of the burst through the doors of the glorified asylum, not letting anyone even try and stop them. They weren't dragged away by the orderlies until they had already seen the shards of glass that remained of Polly's window.


	7. 1x7

Jughead woke up, shaken by his dream. Stabbed in Archie in the back? He wonder what his subconscious even meant by that. Was it because he kissed Betty? Was it because he hadn't told him? Jughead was annoyed that even he had subscribed to the notion that somehow Archie had some claim on Betty. He understood why he should eventually tell his friend the truth about the kiss, but that didn't necessarily warrant sleeping Jughead calling himself a backstabber. It had to be something else.

Was it because he was living at the school and didn't mention it to Archie? Or rather, adamantly lied about where he was living to Archie? Maybe, but still Jughead struggled with the idea that he somehow owed Archie this information. Even though his dream really spooked him, Jughead didn't hate the sight of Betty with a diamond ring on her left hand. He also didn't hate being welcomed into the Cooper kitchen with open arms either. It was starting to seem more like a dream than a nightmare as his morning went on, but he still couldn't shake that weird feeling about Archie.

He began his usual morning routine, now in a new place: showering, shaving, brushing his teeth, until he was startled by the sight of Archie in the mirror. He asked the questions he dreaded most, forcing him to explain that he lived under the stairs in a forgotten closet.

Then he started to think that he was a backstabber. He'd been living away from home for months now, since his sister and mother left in the spring. He had the opportunity to tell Archie about what happened with Betty yet still he found himself being deceitful. He didn't know why because he knew it wasn't so big a deal, but for some reason he did feel truly guilty.

His day only worsened when he heard the despair in Betty's voice before class. She tried to remain as calm as possible, and as always he was impressed by her strength, but Betty was literally falling apart. He said all the reassuring words he could, but without even thinking he threw his arm around her shoulders and lovingly rubbed her neck. She instinctively grabbed his hand, intertwining their fingers. He hadn't realized what he had done until he met the eyes of Veronica, Kevin, and Archie. He didn't care enough to pull away, simply because the feeling of Betty touching his hand in public sight was one of the greatest pleasures he had in a long while. Truthfully, he also knew that Betty needed all the love she could get and he was more than happy than oblige. He was so focused on comforting her that he didn't even think to worry that she wouldn't want him touching her. He was more than thankful that wasn't the case.

His anger flared again at Archie's confrontation. He didn't think Archie had the right to say he was "totally cool" with him and Betty. It had nothing to do with him. Literally nothing. He was angry up until Archie announced Fred's offer to employ FP.

He was dreading going home. He had half a mind to hope that his father would be reasonable about accepting his job, or he'd at least be sober. Naturally, he was wrong. Jughead was willing to beg and plead, which is exactly what he ended up doing. He wanted his family back together more than he had ever wanted anything before. He would have given up _anything_ to see his father on his feet, employed, and sober so his mom and Jellybean could be back with them once more. Jughead was desperate in his attempt to force his father to see this, but he was once again disappointed and heartbroken with his father. He walked back to school, solemn, feeling more numb than ever.

The next morning he woke up earlier than he had in a long time. He still felt absolutely nothing, so he did what he always did: threw himself into his work. He met Betty in the woods and comforted her as she choked through her plan. Yet again, Jughead was left breathless with her. He really needed to stop underestimating her. She was simply brilliant. For the first time in a long time Jughead wanted Polly to be safe for Betty's sake more than for the sake of his curiosity and writing. He was shaken by that realization. _Wow, I really love this girl._

His heart sank seeing the Mrs. Cooper's heartbroken cries for her daughter. He never thought he could feel an ounce of pity for Alice Cooper, but he really felt horrible for her. This deepened when he saw the Blossoms appearing in the distance. He was disgusted by the words of the Blossom family towards Alice, again a feeling he never thought he'd feel for her. She seemed so human like this. She was just a mother looking for her daughter.

Betty wanted to keep looking, but Alice immediately called off the search. Jughead walked with her back into her home and stayed for the impromptu press conference, not taking his eyes off Betty once. He was filled with anger again, at Alice, at Polly, at whoever killed Jason, but ultimately at the world for putting Betty in this situation and making her feel like this.

His only plan after that was to take her to dinner. He grabbed her hand after the cameras were all gone and just started walking, knowing she'd follow without question. He bought her some fries and a milkshake, her usual vanilla, and said all he could to comfort her. Before it got too late, being the gentleman he now knew he was, he walked her all the way home hand-in-hand. He joked about a killer being on the loose, but he was really and truly worried for her safety more than usual. Her continued trying to console her about Polly, but was left breathless at Betty's abrupt kiss. He smiled brightly, thanking whichever deity was responsible for that moment. A second kiss. Jughead practically skipped his way back to school. He was on cloud 9, ecstatic. He wasn't sure what he and Betty were, but at that moment it didn't seem to matter. She kissed him which made up for him chickening out on implying they should have a title by a million.

He was so happy about life that even let himself have a glimmer of hope for his father. After dinner with him and the Andrews, even though it ended roughly, his father seemed more together than he had in months. Even though he tried his hardest to keep it inside, Jughead was almost happy for a moment.

It was just for a short moment, of course, because FP came prepared with his flask in hand. Just like that Jughead's short-lived happiness was gone. He didn't have the patience to hide his irritation with Archie, as he was far too emotionally absorbed and exhausted carrying his drunken, wrecked father into a truck and onto the couch. He started talking about his family, a small part of him thinking his father would care, but was let down again. He knew now that he should never have that hope for his father and that he should never let himself get happy.

Things only went downhill from there when he received a note from the principal that he was needed immediately. He was panicked, assuming something had happened to his dad. Being a person of interest in a murder case wasn't exactly what he had expected.

He felt stupid for not seeing this coming. Of course the troubled loner with a juvenile past from the other side of the tracks would some how be implicated in this. He wondered if Sherriff Keller knew how stupid he sounded when he talked. He got harassed by some football players and played with patches as a kid. So what? He didn't have the energy to fight anymore

Betty was sight for sore eyes. He was desperate to let her know that he wasn't a part of this. He was almost as desperate to prove his innocence to her as he was the court of law. His heart skipped a beat when he met her gaze and she grabbed his hand, swearing to him she was going to get him out of there. He needed her more than he previously knew. She had a magical way of calming him. For a moment he almost forgot where he was.

And as usual, the realization of his dad's condition dragged him back into the reality that was his pitiful life. Seeing his father, drunk and reckless, at the police station was enough to make him give up on him completely all over again.

"I'll go with you, Dad," he choked out, desperate. His heart, which he wasn't even sure was ever whole, shattered again. He had no reason to believe his father's words, but against his better judgment he had faith in father. Even Betty's healing touch did little for him. The two walked away together, his arm wrapped tightly around her, until Jughead figured it was time to face the music. As he typically did, Jughead just wanted to be alone. He didn't want Betty to have to deal with him anymore, and he assumed she wouldn't want to anyway.

When he knew it was time, he made his way back to the Andrews' house. He came in the door, wordless, and sat on Archie's bed.

"I got you an airmattress. It doesn't look so bad." Archie tried. Jughead still didn't speak. He simply picked up Archie's guitar and strummed it. Jughead only spoke after Archie brought up his father. He admitted to Archie and himself for the first time that he just wasn't going to give up on FP. Not yet.


	8. 1x8

Jughead waited anxiously by the phone for updates from Betty. She was with Veronica, Polly, and Sheriff Keller listening to Polly's version of events. He found himself worrying about Betty, and Polly for that matter, much more than he found himself just interested to hear what she knew. He distracted himself playing zombie-killing video games with Archie. Archie brought out the boyishness in him. He was distracted from his real life for just a moment until, again, he was forcibly dragged back into reality by the mention of the drive-in. His former home was not nearly as homey as the Andrews' house, plus he had meals cooked for him, but the drive-in somehow still felt more like a home than anywhere he'd stayed in a long time.

He listened to the updates with the rest of the gang at school the next morning. Surprisingly, Jughead once again agreed with Veronica. As much as he hated to admit it, she had a point. A baby shower was a simple idea, but a really incredible one. Jughead figured that something as simple as a small party on Polly's behalf would get everyone involved excited about the child and excited about Polly. As Veronica talked he couldn't help but state at Betty. He was close to gawking. She was just so incredibly beautiful, and his heart broke to see her so worked up about this. His mind worked on something to say to comfort her until it occurred to him that he might actually have to go.

"Wait, am I expected to go to this thing?"

"Of course! You're Betty's boyfriend, so," Veronica sipped her coffee.

Everyone in the group exchanged scandalized glances at one another. Jughead's heart thumped wildly out of his chest and he dared to look over at Betty. She smiled, even brighter than usual, at him and blushed. He smiled back, accepting her reaction as confirmation. She was his girlfriend, wasn't she? He had tried to define the relationship with her while walking her home but chickened out. He knew there was no way Betty could possibly reciprocate his level of love for her, but he was thrilled to see that she did want him and only him. He was elated even, not even letting the fact that the words had come from his silent enemy Veronica or Archie's envious glare ruin this feeling for him. The only person who could do that was of course Alice Cooper, as she ran into the room and dragged Betty away.

And because nothing in his life could stay good, Jughead's night ended with hearing the heartbreak in Fred's voice as he broke to his son that they were broke.

That made him all the more inclined to follow along in Archie's plan to help. Jughead wasn't a buff guy, but he had some meat on his bones. He didn't work out much anymore, but it was always a good way to burn off steam or defend himself in the neighborhood if there was any trouble. He would do anything for Fred at this point, too.

He was surprised to find himself having fun. Despite his dislike for Moose, he found himself messing around with the guys and really enjoying it. He didn't often have the change to just mess around and be a guy.

Like all things, even that small bit of fun was ruined. He tried to keep his mouth shut, his inner hostility for authority arising at the site of Sheriff Keller. He kept his mouth shut for as long as he could, but he couldn't help but try to take the Serpents out of it. He prayed that his father didn't have anything to do with this, mostly because he prayed his father wouldn't do this to Fred.

He got Pop's that with his girlfriend (oh how he loved the word) and Veronica and told them what happened. He was still reeling from the fact that his father really could have something to do with this. He had started to regain some faith in his father, as hard as he tried not to, but he couldn't help his fear that FP might have been a part of this hit. He tried his best to hold his emotions in as he adamantly pleaded with Archie to stay away from the bar, but he knew Betty had caught on to his outrage and distress. Luckily Archie was too angry with him to pay attention. He let Betty and Veronica chat away about their worry, but Jughead couldn't think about anything else but the inevitable: Jughead was caught.

He didn't see Betty until next day's baby shower. It was a great distraction for the time being. He put his whole body and soul into that baby shower, doing everything he could to focus anything but the horrors that really filled his mind. He served as Betty's handmaid for the afternoon. He was enamored by her beauty, taking his eyes off her only on the moments he literally had to.

He was kind of fascinated by the baby shower. It was wild to him that all these women, who had spent the last weeks bickering, could fake normalcy for a moment. As per usual, this momentary normalcy was ruined. He was shocked at the site of Archie in the door way, his heart rapidly beating again. He was caught. He knew he was caught. He tried to find the words to explain but he found himself being saved by Veronica again. He was starting to hate her less and less. He shot Betty a pleading look, but her eyes just said "save it, I don't want to hear about it." The fire continued with the women in the room. Jughead stared at Betty as the tears formed in her eyes. He wanted nothing more to pick her up and sweep her away, take her somewhere else and protect her from them all this. Instead he stared from a distance and watched everyone leave the apartment. He left the room to give the Coopers some privacy, preparing what he would say to Betts and Archie.

It felt like hours as he waited for the sound of the door opening and Betty to come in and say, "Polly is finally asleep. What a mess." He couldn't even make eye contact with her as he apologized. He was so ashamed of his lie, but even more ashamed of the truth. As Betty somehow always was, she accepted him and forgave him in an instant. He had prepared to lose her for good, but he felt like this moment was only going to bring them closer. He instinctively threw his arm around her, walking her to the car.

Seeing his father downing a bottle of Jack stung. It pained him to ask, but he needed to know if his father had something to do with this. He looked into his father's eyes desperately, and tragically found himself believing his father. He wasn't sure if it was rational or right, but everything in him told him that his father didn't do this. FP was a lot of things, but Jughead knew he wasn't a killer.

He walked stiffly away from the trailer, his mind still reeling. He was halted by the tug on his hand. He didn't think he could fall for Betty any harder. She always knew the right thing to say to make him feel infinitely better. She always stood by him, even when he knew there wasn't anyone else in the world who would. It was truly him and Betts against the world. His heart soared at the feeling of her lips against his, her tongue gently running against his lips. The kiss was sweet but by far the most passionate one they'd shared.

Betty drove him back to her house and he reluctantly walked over to the Andrew's house. He knew that losing Archie would be the most painful and that this apology would mean the most. He tried his hand at unfiltered honesty. He was lucky that Archie needed him now just as much as Jughead needed Archie.


	9. 1x9

**disclaimer: VERY minor theme of suicide. I just feel like there's no way Jughead could be so gloomy, depressed, and have to endure so much without considering it. He's said things about leaving town, but I think this is something that realistically he would think about.**

Jughead hated to see Betty like this. He was so disappointed with Polly for leaving, but he was mostly just confused. He never thought she would do that, but he couldn't even begin to understand how she could just ignore Betty. She seemed so happy to be reunited with her. He masked his worry to calm Betty's. Out of words of comfort, he gave her a gentle kiss. Betty kissed him back deeply, with much more fervor. Jughead internally groaned, relishing the warmth of Betty's touch on his face. You could've cut the sexual tension with a knife. He wanted to kiss her harder, to shove her down on the bed and pin her down. He wanted to ravish her whole body and take her right there, a fantasy he was taken out of by the sound of Mrs. Cooper's voice. He was thankful she came at the moment and not ten seconds later.

He had to keep himself from throwing himself on her in the student lounge. He was actually pretty happy to hear Archie's opportunity. He was absolutely happy until he saw the gaze his girlfriend and best friend held as Betty quickly rushed to Archie's defense. He put his arm around Betty's shoulder, pulling himself closer to her. He clenched his fist on his side, trying to tell himself it was nothing. He wondered how long he'd have to be jealous of Archie Andrews.

He encouraged Betty to confront Cheryl. He practically dragged her over to her and the other Vixens. Jughead could've thrown Cheryl into the wall after the way she talked to Betty. He rolled his eyes and put a protective arm around Betty, pretending he didn't see the tears that had formed in his eyes.

This was exactly why he was even less thrilled than usual to see her show up at Archie's front door. He felt sick at the sight if the lipstick stain on Archie's cheek. His anger only increased after reading Betty's texts. _She threw a_ brick _through the window?_ He was so disheartened at the world for continually throwing these horrible things Betty's way.

He had to watch her try to hold it together in newsroom the next morning. He couldn't focus on anything but how to fix it. He _hated_ seeing Betty like this again. He would do anything to fix this. He had dealt with the fact that God hated him, but he wanted to punish the world right back for the way it punished Betty. He hated how Betty didn't see how strong she was. Most people would've broken by now, but somehow Betty kept going. He pulled her in for a tight hug, letting her fall apart on him.

Betty went to the hospital with Veronica and Archie was at Thorn Hill. Jughead was alone, and for the first time in a long time he found himself not wanting to be alone. He longed for anyone or anything that would pull him out of his thoughts. He was forced to ruminate on everything that had been happening to him. His father was making little progress and could potentially be involved in a murder, Betty's heart was breaking and the was nothing he could do to fix it, and the Andrew's family was crumbling, too. Everything that Jughead touched fell apart. He couldn't help but think that everyone he loved would be significantly better without him. He had heard about Ethel's father suicide attempt and had since found himself thinking those thoughts again. These thoughts had crawled into his head serval times before. As much as it pained him, he really believed that Riverdale, and possibly even the world, would just be better if he wasn't in it.

He was saved from his own suicidal thoughts by the ringing of his phone. He answered, heard Betty's voice, and darted out of bed to her. He had agreed with Betty about inviting her mom to consult the paper. He wanted to contribute anything he could to mend the splintering Cooper family. Even though he knew she was, Alice didn't show nearly the level of excitement he or Betty did when hearing about Polly's safety. Jughead had tried to hold himself back from feeling something for the family beyond just Betty, but he had actually started to care about Alice.

He didn't think he could hate the Blossoms even more. He listened to Archie, sucking in his lips. He scribbled "HIRAM LODGE" onto a post-it and slapped it onto the murder board. He was heated. How could someone stoop so low as to attack a family? Even though he couldn't stand Veronica, this was just disgusting. He had his "Eureka!" moment, and had subsquently mapped out every single connection Hiram could have to the case. He typed away, ignoring every call from Archie and Betty.


	10. 1x10

**A/N: I have another fic just about Jughead and Betty's fight, and because I'm a lazy bitch I copy and pasted it here. I added the rest of the episode as I always do, but just wanted to let y'all know bc it is written a little differently than the rest of my chapters and I didn't want anyone to think I stole it. There's also more very minor hints of suicidal ideations. ENJOY!**

Jughead, as much as he hated his birthday, thought it was sweet that Fred remembered. He hadn't mentioned it to anyone, but he knew that Archie had the date ingrained in his head as well as his own birthday. He hoped, however, Archie would be too distracted with his parents' divorce to even try on his birthday. With everything that had been going on Jughead felt that a birthday wasn't right.

He hated his birthday. He really did. He wasn't sure if he just didn't understand the purpose of such an arbitrary celebration or if he was just uncomfortable with the idea of his life being celebrated. He wasn't even sure if he wanted to be alive at all, but he knew damn well he didn't want it to be celebrated. Being treated with kindness in any form made Jughead short circuit. His parents were only particularly kind to him in the wake of something horrible or something horrible to come. He was almost traumatized by kindness.

Lucky for him, the exact movies he would've chosen for himself were airing on his birthday. It was fate! He let Archie know what movies they'd be seeing, but was in turn shocked to find out that Archie wouldn't be accompanying him. He was irritated for a brief moment that Archie would expose his secret to Betty. He felt betrayed even though he knew it wasn't rational. He forced himself to warm up to the idea of seeing it with Betty. She was now officially his girlfriend after all and ti would be their first real date. Even though the idea made him cringe, he was well aware that spending the day with Betty was vastly more pleasurable than spending it with anyone else.

Betty was stuck in his mind even more than usual when Kevin let out that Betty and Chuck Clayton got into a loud, heated argument in the cafeteria. Jughead was working on his writing that day so he wasn't around, but he honestly couldn't picture Betty getting into a screaming match with anyone. He figured Kevin might have been exaggerating a little bit, but it didn't stop him from being genuinely worried. He loved Betty, probably more than he should. He just wanted to make sure she was okay. He never liked Chuck, or the rest of the team for that matter, but he couldn't picture Betty being the one to start something with him again. He was never one to care about the school gossip but the was one of the only cases that he was left still curious. She seemed snappy when he asked about the incident, but he was smart enough to drop it.

Halfway through Animal House Jughead felt Betty shaking under his arm. He asked her if she was alright and she whispered that she was just really scared. Thinking that she was trying to be cute, he gave her a chaste kiss and pulled her closer to him.

"Jughead, I'm sorry, but can we go?" Betty whispered. Jughead nodded and took her hand, leading her out of theatre. When they got in the car, Jughead asked "Do you want to go to Pop's?" Betty smiled, "No, why don't we go back to Archie's for a while? I'll make this up to you." Stunned. Jughead was hoping that she meant what he thought she did.

He was wrong. He opened the door of the Andrews' home and chuckled, "Can't believe you were scared, that's funny to me." He looked up and met Kevin's eyes, causing him to step back. Before he could register what was going on the lights were on and he heard what seemed like dozens of voices shouting "Surprise!"

His heart sank. "So this was why we left the double feature," was all he could manage. He got a whiff of the alcohol on Archie's breath as he was pulled into a birthday bear hug. The scent made Jughead tense, a familiar scent of birthdays, or rather any days, of his past. He did a quick scan of the room and saw that Betty had invited several people he had hoped to not be in the same room with until he absolutely had to be on Monday. He tried to skip the pleasantries and find Betty, who of course had abandoned him. His plan as to thank her for trying but insist the two of them just had upstairs and hang out.

His attention was caught by a familiar angelic voice. He looked up to see Betty, beautiful as ever, as she glowed in the light of sixteen birthday candles. He couldn't help but let slip how haunting, and almost creepy, the sight of her was. She pecked him on the cheek, and he hissed that he would much rather of been alone with her. That was truly all he wanted for this birthday. He tried to calm himself, but he was raging inside. He couldn't believe Betty and Archie would do this to him.

Seeing the intense look on Jughead's face, Betty suggested they run to the kitchen and grab some ice cream. He planned to confront her, yell at her even, until he saw the nauseating sight of Veronica being held by Archie. Jughead tensed up even more at this, angry at Archie for touching his enemy and at Betty for her inevitable jealousy at the sight of the pair. When asked if he was really mad, Jughead's face softened. He couldn't stay mad at Betty, especially when she was trying to help. He had to admit that it was a kind gesture although it was a terribly out of place one. He didn't want to be angry, but her heated reaction towards him and the sound of the doorbell set him off.

Jughead would never be seen anywhere near a party of that magnitude in any other circumstance. Jughead would've run or the hills if he had anywhere else to go. He could only handle so much of Cheryl grinding on Moose, Archie's drunken stumbling, and Chuck's mischievous glares. With a sign and an eyeroll Jughead stormed off into the garage.

He sat, pet the Andrews' dog, and brooded. He couldn't imagine a birthday worse than this. His father's drunkenness was replaced by that of the entire student body. He was positive that a good 2/3 of the people in attendance didn't even know his name. As much as he didn't want to be, he was just so _mad_.

He tried to scold Archie, but to no avail. He was much too drunk to take notice of anything he said. His anger was pushed back by his surprise for just a moment upon seeing FP step in the door, gift in hand. His anger returned quickly when he realized that Betty had invited his alcoholic father, whom he barely has a relationship with anymore, to a kegger. He couldn't believe Betty would be so invasive. In that moment, he wanted nothing more than to chew her out and kick her to the curb. Luckily for her, she was no where to be found. He didn't dare enter the house to find her.

She came into the garage a few minutes later. He was furious and he let her have it. He let every insecurity, every fear he had about her, out of his lips with a sting. He knew he was being cruel, especially when he raised his voice, but he couldn't stop. It was word vomit.

"Until you're sick of slumming it with me? Or until Archie changes his mind and says he wants to be with you?" Jughead spat. The moment the words left his mouth he knew he had messed up. He looked into her teary eyes and waited for her to say something back, to tell him that he was a good-for-nothing weirdo, but she never did. She shook her head and turned on her heels, trying to stifle the sounds of her sobs. Jughead clenched his fists and closed his eyes in frustration. He blew it.

"Betts, wait!" He called out after her. She kept walking. He called out again, but Betty took off running. He stood in place, cursing himself for ruining this. He loved Betty; he knew that. She was the only girl he had ever had even remote feelings for. She was the only girl who made him feel like he wasn't so alone, the only girl in town who ever seemed to care about him. But that was over now. He ruined it.

He knew he had gone way too far. He knew Archie was bothered by his relationship with Betty, but he also knew Archie would never say anything about it. What would he say? "Just because I don't want to be with Betty doesn't mean you can be. She's still mine," was all Jughead could imagine, but again, he knew Archie would never come out and say it because he knew it was ridiculous. In his head, Jughead rationalized that he was better for Betty than Archie. He was always open with her, he always told her how he felt, he would never play these mind games with her, and he would never hurt her. The latter was a promise to her just as much as it was a promise to himself, but he had broken it, smashed it into a million pieces. Sorry couldn't even begin to describe how he felt.

He hated himself for what he had said to her. They both knew they were different, but Jughead knew that wasn't an issue for Betty. He knew he didn't have to go there. Jughead knew that she hated being "the girl next door" and he had used it against her anyway. He expected her to snap back at the things he said, but she didn't. He had defeated her, hurt her to the point where she had no words. She had called him her boyfriend, too. Veronica had said it, but Betty never had. It made his heart flutter when she did, as it finally solidified in Jughead's mind that Betty was his.

He said they were on borrowed time. He felt nauseous just thinking about that. If she would've said that to him he would've been devastated and he worried Betty might be. He kicked himself for that. He didn't understand why he did this, why he _always_ did this. He was unbelievably self destructive. When something even remotely positive came into his life he made sure he destroyed it completely. He hated himself for hurting Betty. He absolutely loathed himself. Borrowed time? What did he even mean by that?! He had let out his own deep hidden insecurities about his relationship with Betty, but instead of being a rational human being and just talking them out with her he decided to throw them at her, use them as a weapon to make her back away.

Jughead thought he was going to be sick. He held back tears as he realized with the utmost certainty that she would never truly talk to him again. He was going to go back to being alone, living in a world that didn't belong to him. He wasn't even sure if Archie would take his side on this, but why would he? Jughead was in the wrong and he knew that. He just couldn't believe he had done this.

He knew he had to face the music. He had to let Betty go. He knew she'd realized by now she could do better. He knew the moment he spoke to her she would tell him to get lost, but he had to face that. He needed her to know he was sorry even though he knew it wouldn't change anything. The hurt on her face as he lashed out at her made him realize instantly how much she cared about him, further instilling in him how badly he screwed up. He had the slightest of hopes that maybe he could fix her. He really didn't know if he could lose her.

He bounded in to the house, searching frantically for her. He was stopped by Ethel, which led him to see his father. This whole night was in shambles. He decided that he didn't want to get dumped on his birthday, and that maybe it was best for him to just let Betty have fun for the rest of the night without him. He headed to the door, stopped by Chuck and Sheryl.

He sat on the counter, waiting for his chance to talk to Betty. The whole scene reminded him how much he despised high school and the cruelty of the people in it.

Jughead was tense the moment Chuck opened his mouth. He resisted the urge to spit at Chuck's remark about Betty giving Archie a peepshow. It was lie Chuck knew exactly what to say to set him off. When Chuck had attacked Betty, Jughead was fuming. He didn't even care that Chuck had involved him, but Jughead wanted to kill Chuck for what he did to Betty. He was in awe at what Chuck had said, and in even more shock that Betty didn't deny a thing. He wasn't scared, he was worried. This deepened his self-loathing for what he had said to her.

Chuck had deserved that punch. Hell, he deserved the full Jason Blossom treatment. It was worth a bloody cheek and a black eye. Betty must have been horrified of what Jughead had done. He had further proven that she was too good for him; he was trash and she was treasure. He knew he was done for, but his father made a good point. Maybe Betty needed him as much as he needed her.

He ran up the stairs and back into the house. He called out her name in the kitchen, in the living room, and in Archie's room.

"Betts, please" Jughead practically begged. As an answer to his prayers, he heard the sound of her sniffling. He followed the sound, stopping in his tracks when he heard her sobs. What Chuck had done must have really set her off.

"Betty?" he whispered. He knocked on the bathroom door, "It's me. It's Jughead."

Jughead held his breath waiting for her to open the door. That's when he saw her. Her minimal makeup was still smeared across her cheeks. She made eye contact with him and sobbed into her hands. He rushed to her side, throwing his arm around her and whispering "It's okay, Betts. I'm so sorry, it's okay." She didn't respond.

"Chuck is a douche, Betty. No one will listen to him. It's okay, Betts."

Betty lifted her face from her hands, "I'm sorry, Juggy. I'm so sorry."

"Don't be sorry, Betts. I'm not judging you. We can talk about it."

Betty sobbed, "I don't want to be with Archie. I really don't. I just-" she sniffled, "I just wanted you to have a special birthday. I wanted it to be the best day ever."

Jughead's heart broke again. She wasn't even crying about Chuck, she was crying over _him_. He hurt her so much that she had been brought to tears. He couldn't believe he had done this. He made the love of his life a heap of tears just because she threw him a birthday party. He pushed her far, far way because of a birthday party.

"Come on, Betts, let me get you a milkshake. I promise it will help."

His heart hurt at the thought of the things he had said to her. Betty was so hurt, and a big part of that was because of him. It destroyed him. He couldn't believe he was such an idiot. He never wanted to let his damage affect his relationships, especially not his relationship with Betty. He knew she was the girl for him. She stayed, she cared, and he really thought he might love him back. It killed him inside to see her hurt and to see how much she had hurt herself.

He was eternally grateful that he hadn't had to lose her. He work up the next morning in the brightest mood he had been since he first kissed Betty. He even got up, got himself a cup of coffee, and was about to start cleaning up when he saw Veronica saunter down the stairs. This was a sight that would usually anger him, but he was just so chipper that he didn't even care. He was almost happy for Archie. He was truthful in his problem to both Veronica and Archie that he wouldn't say a thing.


End file.
